Sweet, chewy & smooth…That is my & her definition for COMFORT. When I am nervous, sad, celebrating, lonely, bored…carbs are for comfort. This comfort source is not as reliable as she and I would hope… I need a healthier supply of comfort.
I have decided to do a sort of carbohydrate-detox. Most would know it as a South Beach diet or Atkins diet. No carbs, 2 weeks. I’m on day 4. I have always been a primarily night-time binger. The last couple nights, I have thought about wanting to eat when I was not hungry at all just for comfort and to diminish the start ofher obsessive thought process. What did she want?…carbs. But, I am not eating carbs. So, no binge. Cheese or a hard boiled egg didn’t sound great or comforting to her like a chewy “protein” bar or a toasted english muffin with natural peanut butter…so, I didn’t eat. I brushed my teeth and I went to bed happy that I didn’t eat just to eat, just to chew, just to taste, just to “comfort”.
Some people will not agree with this no-carb thing… as purely a diet, I do not agree either. But, I am trying to make a point to myself, to her. Eating to live, not the alternative…the alternativeo of chewing just to chew, tasting just to taste, eating just to eat, thinking about what to eat & what not to eat, what I should eat or should’t eat…
Eating to live, not THAT alternative… That’s all I want to do…I don’t want to live to eat for comfort. I just want to live…eat to live.